Day 11 UPDATE!

THERE ARE NO UPDATES!

We are in the stages of repetition. 
EAT
CRY
BURP
CRY
SLEEP
(NO WAIT, I'M NOT SLEEPING, IM CRYING)
CRY
PEE
CRY
CHANGE DIAPER WHILE CRYING
POOP
CRY
CHANGE DIAPER WHILE CRYING
SLEEP

One thing I have learned... Andrea has waaaay more patience than I do.  It's true what they say.  It is a virtue and I'm still trying to acquire it.

Scott and Brenda are coming into town again this weekend.  They even offered to watch the little guy Friday night so Andrea and I could get away.  Here's a question... If you've been catering to your newborn every second for the last 10 days while you're home, how would you spend your first block of alone time with your significant other?   Dinner?  Movie?  Cavalia since its in town?  Blues game since they're kickin' ass?  All seem like normal, good choices...

Andrea and I, on the other hand, are going to Wal-Mart.  Nothing makes me realize how much I love her more than dodging white trash during the rush hour of grocery shopping.  "Sir, I'm sorry, your container of pepper is leaking.  Nope... that's just the dirt and grime puffing off you with every step you take."  I'm going to bring a couple matches and a flask of wine just in case they have a taste test table.  Let's keep our fingers crossed :)

Newborn Pics by Steph

You'd think son would be ecstatic to father coming home.  Nope.  This is what I walk in my home to.  He could care less.  "Guess who bought you that Boppy, Cash!?"  Ok... Ok... it wasn't even me but if he wanted another, guess who that would come from!?  Alright, I guess I could give him more credit.  Today, he finished our taxes, vacuumed, and rebricked our back patio.  I'll let it slide just today, buddy.

What I come home to after being gone for 16 hours.  He's had a rough day.  I tried sharing his Boppy but he just hogs the whole damn thing.

For those of you without Facebook, or who just haven't seen them, here are some pics by Steph.  She came over Sunday and after an hour of trying to get Cash to fall asleep, here are some previews.

Dad's Little Clone

John - 1984

Cash - 2012

Night @ Home #4 = SUCCESS!



The beast stalks his prey.

Woo Hoo!  Sleep!

There a few factors that I believe lead to our slumber triumph.
1.  We had visits from Grandpa S., Grandma L., Uncle Kyle, Aunt Shea, Uncle Greg and Aunt Julie so playing hot potato for 7 hours probably kept him from sleeping as good as he wanted to... Take that, ya little nocturnal noisebox.

2.  We didn't hold him right before he went to bed.  Friday night Uncle Nathan and Aunt Bethany visited so Bethany held him of course, no big deal, however when they left it was bedtime and lil Cash didn't want to lay on his own.  (Or this was perfectly fine and Cash was just pissed that Uncle Nathan didn't want to hold him.)

3.  We compromised between boppy sleeping and crib sleeping and laid him in the bassinet that attaches to the Pack N Play.  After doing so, Andrea and I experienced the peaceful bliss that we've longed for ever since the day he was born.  (5 days ago.)

Cash slept so good he woke up with Emo hair.

Day 5 Pics

Cleveland's a little weirded out by the mysterious machine sucking lactation from Andrea's FunBuns.

So one thing we learned after 2 straight nights of screaming... Daytime sleeping on Boppy makes nighttime crib sleeping super sloppy.

Therefore, this is the second session of daytime back/side sleeping. I am Master... Cash is Grasshopper. Sleep well, my son.

Day 4 Pics

To be clear, this IS a different shirt than yesterday.  Don't believe me?  Compare the logos.  You feel dumb now don't you?

To be more clear, that is spit up on my shorts.  Get your head out of the gutter.

Today was rather uneventful.  That translates into, today was AWESOME.  We lounged around, took turns napping with the help of Brenda, and attempted foot and hand prints in Cash's baby book.  He's not a high fiver just yet... see for yourself.

Also you'll notice that he did a little two-step with the foot print.  It appears that later in life he'll be a UFC fighter because he only wants to make a fist, or have a starring role in Step Up 5:  The New Generation.  I prefer option 1.

Night @ Home #1

Holy hell.

First of all, great decision on taking the nightly nurse care at the hospital.

Second of all, my wife is amazing.  You hear about that motherly intuition that women just naturally get when they have kids... well I've seen so much of that in the last 50+ hours (especially last night when she didn't even seem to be tired when she had to get up  -  I, on the other hand, pictured a zombie holding a newborn when it was my turn).  To be honest, I've been a little frustrated/jealous whenever Cash is in my arms crying and then Andrea casually walks by and drops a little, four-word sentence of advice that magically soothes him.  Where did that come from!?  You've been a mother just as long as I've been a father!?

She must have heard me scream that in my head because she made yet another good point, "well, I did carry him for over nine months.  Touche, Andrea.  Touche.

So advice to dads, this is just what I've learned in the 2.5 days of being a father: 
1.  Follow the Leader (this is obviously Mom).  Do exactly what they say because as much as you may hate to admit it, they know best. 
2.  Give advice when they ask but don't be surprised when it doesn't work and the suggestion they thought was 2nd best to yours does work.
3.  Lastly, if you have a son, accept the fact that you're not the man of the house anymore because around these parts... Cash rules all.

Day 2 Pic Art

Homeward Bound

Should be goin home this afternoon. Cash just had his circumcision so he might be little Sassy when he gets back. It looks like overcast all day so there's a small Chance he'll see his Shadow when he takes his first trip outside.

Had a good visit from Kait n Lou yesterday. Lou was thirsty so he made a pit stop in the Lactation Station. Waitin on Rob n Jo this morning. Also looking forward to introducing Cash to the dogs. Should be fun.

ANDERSON HOSPITAL TRADITION.  Right above the Room 112 sign... naturally.

I think the print could be better.  Not to mention the name.  #NurseFail

Simple picture, right?  Wrong.  This took 3 tries because Andrea hates a camera.  First she looked away, second she looked high.  Finally, she got it.

Birth Hangover

I don't wanna be held.
I don't wanna latch on to mom for food.
I just wanna lay in my boppy pillow and keep making shit diapers :)

If I have this much fun with a boppy pillow, I can't wait to play with GI Joe again! #yayfortestosterone

I love boppy more than mommy. *Note to future parents. #thecryterminator

Samuel Cash Reed

Born @ 1830, 19 inches, 9 lbs 0 oz

Journey Begins

0520 - locked and loaded. Headin to Anderson hospital.

0610 - checked into our honeymoon suite. Andrea just put on a kinky little number for me.

0720 - pitosin started.

0755 - Andrea ate jello. It was yellow favor and looked delicious.

0810 - My cereal fill has worn off, I indulge in some peanut butter crackers.

0823 - Doc broke her water. My shoes are squishy.

0930 - Andrea had to pee. No nurse available. Luckily her husband is a medical professional to unhook/hook up her machines for her to use the restroom. Her bladder is grateful.

0950 - Pitosin increased for the second time. Contractions a little more intense. HGTV is surprisingly interesting.

1030 - The lady next door starts pushing. Jealousy ensues...

1035 - Next door has baby. Hatred ensues...

1055 - Dilate check. Andrea was hoping for a 6/7. Reality is 4/5cm. Bring on the labor ball.

1129 - After ~4 hours of contractions, the E word has been mentioned.

1230 - Epidural started. Giving modern medicine a hello and a handshake.

1325 - Epidural not working. Possibly placed wrong, want to punch the CRNA in the vag.

1345 - Epidural #2 started. Hoping "3rd times a charm" doesn't show it's ugly head.

1352 - Epi #2 successful. Nap time for mom. Lunch time for dad. Dilated 6/7cm.

1500 - ....zzzz....

1650 - Dilated 9/10cm! There's light at the end of the vagina... I mean tunnel!

1705 - Room setup, pushing will commence shortly. Stay tuned.

1750 - pushing has commenced. We have hair...

1928 - Samuel Cash Reed 1830 19 inches 9 lbs even

Uneventful Week 38

Hello everyone!

Sorry, I know I haven't wrote in a while but gosh darnett, Andrea's
been so boring lately that she hasn't given me any material.  Here's
the rundown of the past week:

Monday:  So boring I don't even remember.  I cooked some delicious chicken that I marinated in Schlafly Octoberfest beer and Wooster sauce.  Oh... and Andrea was around somewhere.  That's all I got.

Tuesday:  Farewell mucus plug!  She lost it...  I'm still looking for
it.  I'll keep you posted.

Wednesday:  DR appt.  She's 2cm dilated and Doc says she should go all
the way until her due date.

Friday:  She left early because she's not feeling as good as she has
been.  No crazy/consistent contractions, just more pressure than
usual.  That's cuz my baby boy weighs 10 lbs and is gonna be an
All-Pro linebacker for the Packers.

Saturday:  Andrea tried working him out.  She helped me clean the shed, swept the garage, cleaned the dog bowls, and cleaned off the back patio.  Funny thing is, whenever I started picking all the tiny sticks and dead leaves out of the landscaping... she disappears to take a nap.  What a weenie. 

Sunday:  This is my pick in the work pool.  Let's see if I know Andrea's body as well as I think do.  *wink face*  (sorry to the family that didn't want to hear that).  Today, Andrea tried drinking him out.  We went to the winery for Momo's birthday and she downed like 4 bottles.  It was quite impressive.  Her and Cash currently have a hangover.  (kidding)

It's not looking good though  for my pick.  It's now 605pm so unless a miracle happens... we won't meet him today either.

Join the pool, leave a comment with what you think will be the
birthday and time.  DID YOU SEE THAT?   LEEAAAVVEE A COMMENT....  All
you do is click on "COMMENT" to leave a comment and then you type in
your comment.  It's easy.

COMMENT!

When Cat Owners Have Kids



First and foremost, Andrea received a negetive reading on the Pre-eclampsia yesterday.  Therefore, no early entry for lil Cash. 

Above you will find what appears to be Fort Knox for our upcoming child.  Only this time, the pussies are invading.  Imagine being 4 days old and waking up to this in your face...



Enter:  CRIB TENT!  We had to make a trip all the way to Fairview Heights and into the most ghetto Burlington Coat Factory I've ever seen for this thing.  I hear I can put this over us in the bathtub when a tornado comes also...  Bargain!